I was 21 years old, 25 years ago when this photo was taken. It was a selfie (back before that was even a thing and digital photography) that I took whilst in the recovery process of a psychotic episode in 1994.
I think at this point I had stopped taking the meds (Stellazine and/or Melaril) which were pretty heavy duty at the time but rarely get used now. First generation antipsychotics. I had spent 6-weeks in a psych ward and got out perhaps a couple of weeks prior. I think I look and know I felt very lost at the time, not knowing how to get back to life again. I used to watch TV soaps just to try to figure out how to interact with people again. I went for long periods without showering and spent a lot of time trying just to sleep, to drown out my thoughts.
Four subsequent episodes with the last in 2017, I feel like I’ve got a handle on that aspect of my mental health insofar as I always know I will recover. Just wanting to share the message that people can and every minute, do recover from psychotic illness and learn how to manage. I still struggle with episodes of depression, but I’m still learning about that. Help is around if only you ask for it and actively seek it.
Love your bravery and honesty… I grew up in the same time period and was also very lost as a 25 year old. When I looked into the eyes of this young woman that you were, I saw my own young self, and I want to give her a big hug and tell her everything will be okay, everything will make sense eventually.
Please keep sharing… with blessings, Louisa
Thank you, Louisa. Kind words and a big hug are what she really needed. I appreciate your encouragement and care 🙂